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"It was the fastest-ever swim over that distance on American soil." Greg Phillips, Portsmouth News

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Some nasty new computer viruses
Lewinsky Virus: Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then e-mails everyone about what it did. Ronald Reagan Virus: Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored. Prozac Virus: Screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn't care. Lorena Bobbit Virus: Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy, then discards it through Windows. Viagra Virus: Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy. Clinton Virus: Gives you a 7" hard drive with no memory.
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