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"I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a Great White or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot." - Kevin James


Questions sent to the Sydney Olympic Committee
Here are some of the classic questions being asked of the Sydney Olympic Committee via their Web site, and some answers that may be appropriate. * I hear that all Australian women are beautiful. Is that true and if so, can you send me pictures of the available ones? (Italy) * I want to go swimming at Bondi Beach on October 20th. Will I turn blue? (Germany) * Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK) * Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA) * I plan to take some day trips during the Olympics. Which direction should I drive - Perth to Darwin or Darwin to Perth - to avoid driving with the sun in my eyes? (Germany) * I want to walk from Perth to Sydney for the Olympics - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden) * Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Australia? (Sweden) * It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed porpoise. (Italy) * My client wants to take a steel pooper-scooper into Australia. Will you let her in? (South Africa) * Are there any ATMs in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK) * Where can I learn underwater welding in Australia? (Portugal) * Do the camels in Australia have one hump or two? (UK) * Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK) * Do you have perfume in Australia? (France) * Do tents exist in Australia? (Germany) * Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France) * Can I drive to the Great Barrier Reef? (Germany) * Are there killer bees in Australia? (Germany) * Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA) * Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany) * Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA) * Which direction is North in Australia? (USA) * Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA) * I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA) * I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia? (USA) * Are there places in Australia where you can make love outdoors? (Italy) * I was in Australia in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Kings Cross. Can you help? (USA) * Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
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